Why I Spook Easily

Allow me to explain how I, Vanessa, an intelligent, sensible, and rational woman can turn to a complete nincompoop when Cpl. Mayhem leaves for long periods of time.
And I mean crazy, "what in God's name is wrong with her", scared of her own shadow kind of nincompoop! I'm that paranoid woman who not only makes sure her doors and windows are locked before she goes to bed, I double check them and spend the night in a complete panic when he's gone. Sleep doesn't come easily I tell you.

Cpl. Mayhem was away at basic training when Ducky and I got an apartment back home, it was the perfect way for baby and I to connect and give my mother/military wife skills a workout after living with both my in-laws and my parents for the first six months.

For a while everything was going great! Ducky and I had a routine of getting up and walking into the kitchen and making breakfast. We would then walk out of the kitchen to the balcony and eat there while enjoying the fresh air and planning for our day. After a full day of walking, window shopping and playing, I get Ducky ready for bed and I wind down for the rest of the evening.

Fun times on that balcony!

Some evenings would take a little longer to wind down and on this particular night I was still up listening to my iPod in bed at 2 am. The song I happened to be listening to stopped but the banging continued and I realized that the banging was coming from my front door. Now usually, I don't panic with such things except I had watch a 20/20 murder episode and I was freaked out a little. So my common sense went right out the window and I grabbed Cpl. Mayhem's Samurai sword and went to the door.

I open the door a crack to find a guy who was completely intoxicated at my door. He was muttering a bunch of nonsense and I told him he got the wrong house. His replied something about having powder and using it. Now if I was in a right frame of mind I would have thought "Yes, it sounds like you did have some powder, get the hell off my front step", but instead I thought of Anthrax- because that was the biggest threat of the time.

I look at him and I said " I have a Samurai sword  and I will use it!", to which he looked down and saw that I really was holding one and ran like hell. Except what I saw was him run towards my balcony, which was really easy to climb up on and THE DOOR WAS WIDE OPEN. Not just unlocked.  Swung open! My first thought then was Ducky, I ran to his room and I called the cops. I then called my mother-in-law, who was more than willing to watch me as I break down.

Both the cops and my mother in law got there around the same time and I told the cops what happened and while I was giving my statement, two of the cops took off running when they saw the guy running out of the apartment next to mine. Did I mention that I'm still holding the Samurai sword?

My mother-in-law lifts up my hand and says, "What exactly were you going to do with this?"

I looked down at the sword I realize not only is the sword still in the sheath, it was still on the mantle piece to display it in our room!

Six years later I look back and laugh at how silly I was but it did put a mark on my soul a little. I don't fear being alone, I've been used to Cpl. Mayhem coming and going for years. It's when the sun goes down where panic sets in a little and even some of the smallest noises, some that when hubby is home that I would have dismissed get my undivided attention.

Oh I wish I wasn't so easily spooked!