Graduate of the Radio and Television Arts Program & Media junky. Wife of a soldier, mother of two. Driver, maid, mediator, judge, jury, parole officer, crisis negotiator. Dont confuse your rank with my authority!
Momversation Monday! Hope everyone had a well rested weekend! I sure hope so because Jessica Gottlieb is asking how did you get your Pre-Pregnancy body back!
Honesty time! I haven't lost a whole lot of weight since having Ducky and Chicky. In fact I can no longer say "it's just baby weight" because my "baby" is three years old!
SO... Where I go from here?
After a ton of medical problems and medications and I'll admit lack of motivation I'm finally where I want to be mentally to get the pregnancy "whatever you want to call it " weight. No matter how much you want to lose weight sometime you are just mentally not ready to do that. Think about it. How many times have you said "I'll start my diet on Monday"?
We all know that there is no magic pill, overnight results and all that. But as my dad always says there is a secret.
Eat less and move more!
I have a cruise I'm going on with my mother in law, aunt and various family members and I want to be wearing a bikini by October. A friend of mine introduced me to Body for Life and I lost 30 pounds on it before I got sick. It worked for me once and I will start up this program again today.
It's a 90 day program, it's easy to follow.
I'll keep you up to date on my results in 90 days.
How did you get your Pre-pregnancy body back?!
Tell me what you did and then go to Momversation for a chance to win a P90X and 10 Minute Trainer DVD!
Tweet about this contest. Leave 1 comment for each tweet with the link to the tweet. Copy and paste the following: GIVEAWAY! I entered to win #Stella&Dot Jewelry from @MWMayhem and @TracyTHall http://bit.ly/h0rT1Q
You must leave 1 comment per entry. Extra entries will not be counted unless you leave a comment for each one. Contest runs until February 11th.Winner will chosen with random.org and notified by email on or before February 12th.and asked for full name, address. If no response, a different winner will chosen. Must be 18 or older to enter. Contest open to USA or APO/AE and Canada. Prize will be shipped directly by Tracy T Hall, an independent stylist for Stella and Dot.
Jessica Gotlieb asks the panelist if they are prepared for an emergency and what they would do in an emergency.
We had an earthquake during the summer, and when the house started to shake I was sure that it was a tank going through my backyard. When I went outside to see if it was just me that felt that my neighbours were just as freaked out as I was! My husband was gone and I was alone with the kids. It made me realize that we needed to have some kind of emergency kit, exit strategy, something so I feel at ease while Cpl. Mayhem was on deployment.
So I made an emergency kit to start off.
Personal information- birth certificates, passports, marriage certificate
Photos of each family member in case we get separated
I also had one emergency kit for winter last year in case we got stuck in the highway.
When I went through the list I realized that I did not have everything that we needed in case of an emergency! This website has everything you need to know before, during and after an emergency. It also has a great check list of everything you need for your emergency kit including recommended additional items, making an emergency plan and knowing the risks in your area.
I don't like the feeling of being so unprepared for an emergency now I will have some peace of mind for when Cpl. Mayhem goes away on courses and for when he is home.
Last post was all about the stereotypes that we hear about military wives. The negative stereotypes.
And because this year I've decided my main goal is to make negatives into positives I'm making the looking at the stereotypes a different way.
#1 It takes a strong woman to pick up her life from her friends, family and career to move to the other side of the country to be with the man she loves. We choose this life because we fell in love with a man that happens to be a soldier.
#2 Military spouses are resilient. We have to be! In a split second you can get posted to another location. We learn to take any obstacle or hardship, roll with the punches and bounce back better than before. Nothing is written down in pen, anything can change at drop of a hat. We learn to have a plan B, C and D.
#3 Military spouses are the most educated bunch of women I have ever met. And they are the most undervalued group. With constant moves throughout their soldier's career, military spouses' careers are put in the back burner. Employers hear "military spouse" and the chance of getting a job is gone in a snap because who wants to train some for them to leave a couple of years later.
Some military spouses now run their own businesses that they can take from posting to posting. And I don't just mean your typical Avon and Tupperware parties. Some military spouses have become photographers, bakers, making gift baskets, consultants, freelance writers, hair dressers, and aestheticians. We have learned to take lemons and we make lemonade.
#4 Military spouses are mature. You have to grow up a lot more in this lifestyle. You learn to make big decisions like having to make a will, setting up emergency contact numbers and preparing for the worst. You learn to fix things on your own because something will break down when your soldier is gone. You need to rely on yourself to get through any sort of crisis.
#5 Military spouses are firmly rooted in reality. We are thrown into this fishbowl life. And in our reality we have the understanding that our soldiers jobs puts them in life or death situations. So we enjoy every minute they are home and capture every important event so they don't miss a thing while he is gone. Homecomings are better than holidays.
There you have it! Some of the great things about military spouses. Did I miss anything? Tell me what I forgot.
What are some of the misconceptions or stereotypes of being a military spouse? It's a curious world to those who are not in it. But with all the mystery there is to being a military wife those crazy stereotypes come up:
Do we gossip, are cliquish and fight all the time?
Are we overly proud and wear our spouse's ranks as our own?
We are cheating on our spouses the moment they leave?
Or my personal favourite:
We are uneducated, living off our husbands, with no hobbies or ambitions of our own.
I call this stereotype my favourite because it's the one I feel we as military spouses spend more time hearing about, defending or trying to ignore. This one just makes me mad.
First, because I met my husband BEFORE he joined the military we met in college where I was studying Radio and Television Arts. He and I had a total of 5 jobs between the two of us while we were dating and when we got married. Once we had our first child he was in basic training and I was still on maternity leave. I chose not to go back to work because I went to visit my parents for 4 months during his training.
I went right back to work when we got posted to base. It took six months to find a job (and not for lack of trying) but I got one. I was there for a year and went on maternity with my second child. I didn't go back because financially it made no sense for me to go back to work. I was spending more on child care than what I was making. If I was working in my field and getting paid better I would have no problem going back to work.
"There’s also another layer to this issue. The military is still structured around an older concept of a wife staying home with children, not a working woman who might want a career or satisfaction outside of military life. The culture has changed with society – no one expects us to be housewives anymore – but the practical necessities of military life haven’t. Being in the military means the needs of the mission are more important than the needs of the person doing it, or of his family."
Second, gold digging military spouses? What military are you talking about?! That's just funny.
Third, if there are lazy, spouses who are living off their husbands, I'm sure it has nothing to do with military life, because if they were doctor wives or lawyer wives they would be doing the same thing. And why is that because I'm a military spouse and stay at home mom that's a strike on my character but every other civilian stay at home mom doesn't get the same kind of judgement?
Makes no sense to me!
What are some that you think are just funny or needs to be straighten out?
What do you do when people you thought you were friends with just don't give a damn about you.
You make efforts to hang out and you get the cold shoulder. Or worse, you are told a coffee date or something is going to be done only to be cancelled a couple of hours before.
I get that it's winter and it's cold and play dates are harder to plan but if I put the energy out there to spend time with these said "friends" what's the point really if the door is getting shut in my face time and time again.
It doesn't help when the people who are shutting you out are the ones that you thought you connected with the most over the course of the long and trying year. Still don't know if I did something wrong but at this point my low is so bad I just don't give a crap.
If we get posted somewhere else it would be a great! Would I miss it here? Of course, it's our first base posting and there are some good people here. I just need a change,
Our base has been run down with garbage for as long as I can remember. In fact, when we were told we were going to be posted here I went on a forum and had many military spouses say that certain spots on base were better than others so I worked but my butt off trying to get the RHU (Residential Housing Units) that I wanted.
It was always a surprise to me and other spouses on how some of the house looked more like landfills rather than houses.
Just this year the Base Commander started Operation CleanSweep.
We can now expect more stringent enforcement of Housing rules with the implementation of a three strike policy which will now include informing Unit Chains of Command. Housing also plans on improving the layout of the townsite, adding incentives for more community involvement as well as constructing a new vehicle compound to store RV's, boats and extra vehicles.
I think this has been one the best things that happened to our base. It's kind of sad that some people care so little of their Units. I understand that animals get into the garbage and all that but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the mess is left after garbage days, cans on the curb, lids in the middle of the street and what has been dug into by animals is left behind, neighbours ignoring the junk hoping someone else will pick it up.
And the garbage isn't the only thing that is eye sore on this base, some of the yards are pretty hard to look at too and I'm sorry to say I've driven by some that look more like slums rather than yards.
Here's my question. Why does it have to take the Base Commander to make your unit to look decent? Where is the pride in having your house look clean?
Correct me if I'm wrong US military spouses but you guys have strict policies on keeping your landscape in order and fines are issued if it's not up to their standards. We should have had that set up years ago!
I'm hoping this will be followed through and I look forward to hearing more about it and seeing the results from it. And of course there are things to help out.
Put your garbage in bins with lids so the wild animals don't get into them.
If the animals do get into the garbage pick it up before it blows away. DUH!
Take the bins off the curb so they don't blow into the street.
Follow the garbage disposal regulations. If it not meant for it to go in the trash don't put it out, they won't take it.
Every year the base has contest called Q's in Bloom where people put their green thumbs to work and show off their manicured units. I'm not great at landscaping but I'm willing to try it out this spring.
Hopefully once the snow melts and grass grows the base won't look so much like a landfill but more of a base that we can take pride in.
Something we all should have been doing a long time ago. It's sad that it had to get the Base Commander's attention to get something done.
And there you have it! I've completed a challenge!
Now to give you some exciting news I'm working on a radio for Canadian Military Spouses but every military spouse is more than welcome to ask questions, comment and call in.
I'm looking for a great name for the show, write your suggestions down as well as anything you want to hear on the show. I'll keep you posted on when the first show airs but it's looking like the end of the month!
CHRISTINA TAYLOR GREEN (9), DOROTHY MORRIS (76) JOHN ROLL (63)PHYLLIS SCHNECK, 79, DORWIN STODDARD (76) GABE ZIMMERMAN (30)
After the devastating events in Tucson Arizona, where a man opened fire killing 6 people including 9 year old Christina Green the Tuscon community is now getting ambush by another entity.
The Westboro Baptist Church, lead by Fred Phelps, has announced they plan on picketing the funeral of the 9 year old girl on Thursday and has given praise to the shooter for his acts. The group, comprised mainly of Phelps and his family, is well know for picketing the funerals of soldiers who died in Iraq and Afghanistan with signs with such slogans as "God Hates Fags".
This has to be one of the most horrid things I've ever heard! I heard of the WBC after they announced they were going to picket Greyhound Bus victim Tim McLean's funeral and fallen American soldiers' funerals. This is shameful!
This poor family does not need this added grief on top of losing their child. But there is hope!
The funeral is to be protected by the Tucson community and Angel Wings, a group of people planned to wear large angel wings to protect mourners from the picketers. The "angel wings" strategy goes back to the funeral of Matthew Shepherd in 1999, to protect the ceremony from the Westboro loonies. Bikers groups are forming a counter-protest and are crossing their fingers to get the Hell's Angel's to join them saying,
"Nothing says stand back and be silent like a Hell's Angels presence".
And to take it statewide, Arizona state lawmakers are working to pass a bill that would order protesters to stay 300 ft away from the funeral.
I'm not going write here what Fred Phelps has said. Here's what I have to say about the entire thing.
What did a 9 year old girl do to your "church" that they need to be there to protest at her funeral? Hasn't the family had enough heartache? Her death and the deaths of the other victims is not a spot to spew hate, make it an escapade of political finger pointing or any other matter except to remember and morn the victims of this massacre.
This is a tragedy that does not need the Westboro Baptist Church Circus to be a part of. Everyone just needs to stay home and the leave the family to mourn with dignity and peace.
This is a pretty good topic.
Jessica Gotlieb asks the newest Momversation Panelist Becky Harks of Mommy Wants Vodka if she would let her son wear girl's clothing. She brings up a story about her boy wanting and purple butterfly costume for Halloween and he went out trick or treating with it.
I haven't had to answer this question mainly because my son has never had an interest in girl clothes. I insisted from the day my son was born that his clothes wouldn't just fall under your usual boy colors, so we made sure to get a variety of gender neutral colors.
I don't see anything wrong in kids being curious and that includes trying and wear girl clothes. Everyone can make believe, it's fun to dress up and pretend to be someone other than yourself for a while. If my son decided to wear a girl specific costume or clothes for pretend play sure, why not? And sometimes it's not even the kids that have the problem with it. Another blogger wrote about how her son dressed up as Daphne from Scooby Doo and when he got to his school it was the parents to seemed to have more of a problem with his costume than the kids.
For everyday? Probably not. I don't want my son to be subjected to being taunted or looked at funny because he wants to express himself in away that might not be considered normal in our society's eyes. I'd rather he be open to express whatever it is he wants to do or wear now and learn the harsh realities of life when he's older. For now he just likes pretending to be Wolverine.
Where do you stand? Would you let your boy wear girl's clothing?
So for a while now I've been kind of down about living the military life and being know as a military wife. With so much of the negative stereotypes being a major focus in topics of conversation pertaining to military wives, I felt that being a military wife became a bad thing.
For the most part I found the people who are defending military wives, girlfriends, widows are the military girlfriends, wives and widows. And funny enough these same people that are the first to bash other spouses in the same situation through gossip on base.
Until now. The first 35 seconds is an intro but it gets better from there. Fair warning the guy who posted this either has a great Red Bull addiction or has a spunky personality! I love it though!
It was so refreshing not only to be praised for what we do and what we go through but to be praised by a guy was AMAZING!!!
A great pick me up!
Happy New Year Everyone!! I'm happy to say that it is Monday and I'm back doing Momversation Mondays!!
There is a new panelist on Momversation today. Catherine Conners of Her Bad Mother. YEAY!
Daphne asks Catherine about a story she posted on the blog about her breastfeeding another woman's child during an event in New York. Her child was not there and neither was her breast pump and for women who breastfed know the painful feeling of being completely engorged without a way to ease the pain.
During that event Catherine met another blogger and they hit it off. Catherine complained about the painful feeling in her breasts and the mom offered to let Catherine nurse her baby who was getting fussy. At the end of the day both parties were happy. A baby was fed and relief was given to a woman who did not have her own child to ease the pain.
This is where it gets dirty in my eyes. Another blogger who had witnessed this exchange posted on her blog about it and the nasty comments from people saying that she might have had HIV or some other disease. Personally the comments are just sick.
Didn't we have wet nurses back in day? How is that strange now?
Here's my story:
Once apon a time my twin sister and I were preemies being adopted by my parents in Brazil. We were small and we were allergic to formula. My parents signed up at the hospital to have a wet nurse come and breastfeed us.
That was in 1982. No way no how is this gross, unsanitary or wrong in anyway. If it weren't for her we probably wouldn't have survived the deck of cards of crap we were handed in our first couple of months of our lives. So to the woman I never met, I thank you!
To the question Momversation poses today. Would you breastfeed a stranger's child? I'm a huge believer in breastfeeding and the benefits of breast milk but my personal answer would be no. Mainly because I had a rough go with both my kids. If I was able to maybe if it was a friend but I think I would express before breastfeeding.
And for those who think that this would harm a child, there are breast milk donation clinics that screen the breast milk before they give it to an infant.
First I just want to say that the next time all of us are together we NEED to get a new photo! Holy Lord I'm waring PJs while you ladies look like you are ready to go out for the night. And who the hell was taking the photo? LOL!
I can't really remember how we all met. But i'm sure if we sat down figured it out it might have to do with college mutual friend connections. I'm sure there's a good story there! But I'm glad we met cause my world would have been completely different if I didn't.
There is no need to rehash old fights, grudges or "he said, she saids". You four ladies have been what I've been missing since I moved on this base.
I miss having Social Butterfly dropping by when I was bored late at night during Cpl. Mayhem's basic training. Gossiping and laughing over everything, trying not to wake up Ducky. I miss the grammar police!
I miss Apple H's faces she makes when she ruins a photo. AND can you believe there is a photo of her without her tongue sticking out or her eyes crossed?!
I miss Ice Princess and her advice and random dance sequences. My favorite (even though I wasn't there for the premiere of it) I like to call Martian Straws.
I even miss Stun Bunnie's way of missing not one but TWO conversations and THEN commenting over topic one when we are on topic three!
I miss going to Jungle Jim's and ordering eggs and bacon with bacon on the side! Or joking about how we all got our nicknames. Winning a bar contest when the objective was to line your clothes to the end of the dance floor and we won without one of us taking our clothes off! FIGURE THAT ONE OUT! And the guys were so desperate they were so close to taking their boxers off!
I miss watching Paradise Hotel! I KNOW! And Big Brother!
I miss the cottage. Which is funny since Ice Princess believed a motel was roughing it. Social Butterfly hated spiders and I hate swimming but we did learn that we can drink out of cups without touching our hands to our glasses, there is a reason you add the vodka to the watermelon and let it sit for a while before you dig into to it! Cameras are forbidden in the after effects of a drunken night! Water tubes are essential for every Yahtzee event! And bug spray is a MUST!
I miss sitting at Tim Horton's drinking coffee, while Ice Princess tells us a story and then stops in mid conversation just to watch the police sirens go by! Or robot dances, awkward pickups, infamous shirts and quotes.
"I'm not dumb, you're dumb"
"Hi Joe *slurrs speech* can we get daquiris made with vodka with extra cherries?"
"What you talking about Willis?!" Stun Bunny: "I should have pretended to be hit by the car. YES I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING SOCIAL BUTTERFLY. A parked car! You know with me, that could happen!" Three Cheers for the BK LOUNGE!!!
Junior High.... Senior High!
*FINGER* Please tell me you DID NOT go in the boat with those shoes! Oh what? No smart-ass comments from the twins? "Row, Row, Row your boat!!" Social Butterfly: Love your eye shadow Stun Bunny Stun Bunny: Thanks a drag queen helped me with it! "OMG! I hit a hand!!!" "Effin' Ahole!" "Fawk the indoor voice!" OMIGOD YOU GET THE SHIRT! You don't ride the short bus, you're driving it! *beep, beep*! "Did you dress yourself?!" "I love it cause I'm all DUH!"
I just miss you guys! I hate being so far away. We need to make a plan. I'm coming home in the summer so we need to make a plan with everyone to make the trip to the cottage for the weekend. How about it ladies?
I love you all! Taken/ Hot Mama
PS. We really need to update our names since mine is no longer valid since I'm not the only one who is "taken' or is a "hot mama" anymore. We'll have to make that the top of our meeting agenda in the summer! Much love and